It's a Scary, Big World Out There

Looks like I may get to see some of it, too...

Way back when I started this blog, I was a Realtor. Then I sold computers. Then I trained people on how to sell computers. Then I planned all the logistics so others could train people on how to sell computers. Now I manage a global team of people who plan all the logistics so others can train people on how to sell computers.

In a nutshell, that is what I do.

I may, possibly, very likely get to visit some of my team. To be clear, only one person on my team lives within an hour's drive. My team is scattered from the west coast to the east coast of the US, down to Central America, across to the UK, and way over to India. 

I work with people across the globe... US, Latin America, Europe, India, China...

The idea that I could actually meet some of these people face to face is indeed extremely exciting AND scary at the same time...

Thoughts on the Life of a Youth Athlete

I blogged regularly throughout my son's very young years. And then I stopped. It wasn't even a gradual shut down. One day I was blogging and the next? I just wasn't. I popped in every now and then, usually to write a birthday letter or get my New Year's Resolutions down in print. 

I realized a while ago that something was missing in my life. Namely, the outlet here. A place to spill my guts and thoughts without the threat of jeopardizing some relationships. I'm not kidding when I say that Facebook, Twitter, and really the entire "social" media realm are cesspools of the id. I join in. I'm just as guilty as the next party.

Where was I? Oh yes. Youth athletes. So my son is now fourteen years old. He plays baseball, runs cross country, and is a 3rd degree black belt in taekwondo. 14 year old baseball is quite different than 4 year old t-ball. My dad used to say that one of the hardest parts of his job as a 5A high school baseball coach was making the game fun. Making practices fun. 

If you want to be good or even excel at anything in life, you have to use your skill. You must practice. You must do some rote things over and over and over again. And then do those things some more. It can be boring and monotonous. Now add to that coaches and parents who expect the very best. Who expect serious, "get to work" attitude 100% of the time. 

Baseball has become painful to me. I wear workout clothes to practice so I can get a few miles of walking in while Boy Pop practices. Some other moms do that, too. We are there for 2+ hours, so might as well make good use of that time.

But not everyone goes walking. Dads and some moms sit and watch the entire practice. Sometimes they are talking to one another and socializing, but often they have eyes like a hawk... Watching their player. Listening for critiques or praise from the coaches. Looking for things that they, then can critique or praise on the way home. 

We grew up in "Daddy Ball." If you're not familiar with the term, it means that you are coached by a dad or few. I hate it. Dads with very little to no experience with the sport, teaching your son how to hit, catch, pitch, and throw. Showing favoritism. It's brutal. Our team now has a mix of dads and paid coaches. There's a lot of yelling. There is very little goofing off. 

At the end of the day, they have a goal... They want each player to make it onto a high school team and maybe college. I get it. If that is the goal, then you want to be working with coaches who have that same goal. But it's a lot...

Here's my son's schedule today...

7:10 - Wake up, get dressed, eat breakfast, brush teeth, comb hair, get shoes on, grab backpack, and head to the car to drive to school. If he's lucky, he gets a little screen time during all this.

7:45 - Out the door to drive to school

3:45 - Get picked up from school

4:00 - 4:30 - Eat a snack, do some homework

5:00 - Hitting lesson

6:30 - Taekwondo

7:30 - Dinner, shower, more homework

10:15 - Brush teeth and go read

10:45 - Lights out

He's been averaging around one and a half to two hours of homework per night. This is just one day in the life. I don't work nearly as hard as he does! I have a really hard time being hard on him when it comes to extra practice and extra work on sports stuff. The kid has made straight A's now for the 13th consecutive 6-weeks grading period. He's obviously doing something right. Will he be a professional baseball player? I don't know. I don't know if he will play high school ball, to tell you the truth. This year might very well be his last year to play, after playing from the time he was four years old. The thought is simultaneously heartbreaking and a relief. I want him to do what he has a passion for. I want him to have some down time. But most of all, I want him to choose something because HE wants it, not because he thinks we want him to do it.

Right now, I don't know if he wants to play because we want him to play and put pressure on him to do it, or because he actually loves it and has a passion for it. He tells us he wants to and loves it. But is he only telling us what he thinks we want to hear?

This shit is tough, y'all. Sorry for rambling.

Two Posts in One Day!

I vowed after the last neighborhood garage sale I joined that I would prefer to donate my stuff to charity before ever again trying to sell my stuff to greedy thieves...


That being said, I just found out that our next neighborhood garage sale is THIS Saturday. I have recently become overwhelmed by the amount of junk in our home. We moved into a much larger house almost three and a half years ago and have filled every single nook and cranny with so much junk that I can't take it anymore.


Every day, I try to find a few things I can toss out or donate. Every single day. And Every single day, I open cabinets or drawers and want to cry with the mess.


I have found that when the space around me is tidy and neat (and I don't mean hiding behind doors), I am a much calmer and happier individual. Therefore, I have just decreed to my husband that this year, we WILL participate. Now I need to find the time to get cracking and clearing out.

Tap Tap Tap

[Blows dust off this space] Hi! Long time, no blog. I guess Facebook has done a good deal in destroying blogging for me. Actually, Facebook and my iPhone have gone a long way in destroying a lot of things for me... Faith in humanity, love of reading, etc. So late last night, a heavily armed shooter took aim from his 32nd floor window at the Mandalay Bay resort and casino in Las Vegas and started firing, killing 50 and injuring 400+ before taking his own life. What did I see on Facebook first thing? It's time to have a gun control discussion. Never let a good tragedy go to waste, eh? Y'all. Gun control would not have helped. Has anyone even bothered to look at the gun violence statistics? How many of the firearms used in gun violence are owned legally? It's not a gun control issue. It's a 24/7, in-your-face, everyone has an opinion to be shared immediately, fed up, PC-police state issue. It's the fact that we elected someone to the highest office who had the most vitriolic Twitter account in known existence. People are fed the hell up and I'm included. I'm fed up with career politicians. I'm fed up with personal agendas. I'm fed the HELL up with people not taking the running of our country more seriously than the running of their own egos. There is no common sense anymore. Only anger and outrage so blinding that no one is willing to extend a hand to have a conversation about the real threats to our society as a whole, and a media so emboldened and embedded in ratings and advertising dollars that they only pour gasoline on the fire instead of stay unbiased. I'm 43 years old and not going to be silent anymore.

Twelve

“Daddy! A Rubik’s Cube DOES help you get girls!” – Joey Daniel, September 23, 2015

Dear Joey,
Tomorrow, you will turn twelve years old. I need to pause here and let that sink in. Twelve. I spent part of the day today finding the past letters I’ve written you. It is easy to get lost in them. In the memories. It is so easy to become wistful and nostalgic, thinking back on the milestones and the lifetime we’ve shared with you up to this point. I used to post these letters to my blog, and go month by month, listing out all the things we did. It is nice to remember.

Each year seems to go by at a faster and faster pace. Maybe it is because we are all getting older. Maybe it is because we are so busy. Maybe it is a combination of both. It hardly seems possible that in a year, you will officially be a teenager.

This last year has probably been your busiest and most challenging year yet, but you managed to handle all the school work and all the extracurricular activities and shine the entire way. Fifth grade had its tough moments for sure. There was a lot of homework, you had multiple teachers, many projects, and even learned firsthand about different methods of conflict resolution. In November, you performed again in the school’s annual program (this year, it was the 80s- Totally O’Rama – and you belted out a line from Livin’ on a Prayer! It was awesome!). You competed in the Science Fair in January and the first elementary academic UIL competition in the spring! You also managed to earn straight A’s yet again to close out your elementary school career.

Let’s talk about baseball for a bit, shall we? You are still on the Round Rock Vipers Select Baseball Team. If my calculations are correct, your team played and practiced together for nine out of the past twelve months. That adds up to a whole lot of baseball! To be honest, you have had some ups and downs. You have gone through a hitting slump or two and have had games where you were just, for lack of a better word, off. You love your team, though. And baby, when you are on? You are ON. I don’t know how you do it, either. You have this drive and perseverance that never ceases to amaze me. You work your way up and out of the rough days and they become fewer and fewer as you get better and better. Your attitude and determination shine through both during the games and during practices. And your perseverance pays off. You did not end the spring season with a hitting slump. Instead, you hit a walk off triple to win one of our World Series games in July! What a moment! And then you got an entire month off only to start again, this time in 12U. Our team has such a good record for the spring season that the powers that be moved us up into a more difficult division. Your team is in development mode this season, and you are getting an opportunity to play some different positions. First base is still your favorite, but you love the outfield and getting those opportunities to make the big plays. You also enjoy pitching, but don’t do it that often. We play our second tournament this weekend. I love to watch you play.

In addition to baseball, you are still lighting it up at Taekwondo. You are actively pursuing your third degree black belt. That belt takes a while. Six mid-term tests, one test for recommended, and one test for decided, in fact. You have successfully passed three of your six midterm tests. I don’t have the opportunity to come watch your classes as much, but I have not missed a test. And every time I see you in your gear or completing one of your complicated forms, I am blown away. You are precise and sharp and have memorized so many moves. You make it look easy when I know it is not. It took hours and hours of practice to get it right.

This year, we also did some traveling and had quite a bit of fun. We went skiing in Beaver Creek in December with your Nana and Granddad. For Christmas, for the first time ever, we stayed at home. Good thing, too, because on Christmas Eve we got a puppy! Our very own little Alaskan Husky. You named her Loki and she is true to her name (the chaos-maker). She is a constant source of entertainment and dog hair. Your father and I also took you to Playa del Carmen for both Spring Break and an end of summer vacation. Spring Break was a little rough. You hurt your knee right before our trip and also got a respiratory virus. The virus wasn’t so hard on you, but then you shared it with me and your father and it took us out. You did get to hang out and just relax and play on your iPad quite a bit that week, though. We also went to League City, TX with the team to play in a baseball tournament and go to a Houston Astros game. That was such a great weekend!

In May, we also started talking about summer vacation plans and ideas. You really, REALLY wanted to go on an RV road trip. Some of your friends have gone on these trips and made them sound like a lot of fun. After some digging on my part, you confessed that they sounded fun because your friends also went to amusement parks and rode roller coasters. Your voice broke a little as you said, “And I’ve never ridden a real roller coaster!” Well, we did something about that! We had a family weekend in San Antonio and you got to bring a friend along. We stayed at the Hyatt Hill Country, and your grandparents and uncle also came! You and Anthony had a blast at the pool and y’all even got to surf! The next day, after a very intense but short rainstorm threatened to ruin our day, we headed to Six Flags Fiesta Texas. We were some of the first people to ride their newest roller coaster, the Batman ride. I believe you were able to get your fill of roller coasters that day.

Baseball pretty much consumed the first 7 weeks of summer, not really leaving much time to plan a family vacation. Your grandparents took you to Universal Orlando in June (during a non-tournament week) and you had an absolutely amazing time! Your Nana hired a guide for one of the days in the park and you got to go to the front of every line. While at the hotel pool one day, you also competed in a hula hoop contest. I believe you came in second place. When July rolled around, we realized that we had not planned anything for just US. After some consideration (and lack of planning time), we decided to have a do-over in Playa. It did not disappoint! It also just so happened that you had friends staying just down the beach! Having someone to hang out with makes all the difference! We did all the usual things, too… Exploring in town, lots of beach time, pool time, and we even did the night time Xplor zip lines.

We got home from Mexico and you had two weeks until middle school started. Middle school. I was a teacher at that school the very first year it opened. It never once crossed my mind so long ago that I would actually have my own child walk through those same doors as a student. Yet here we are. You are a month into school and have straight A’s so far, yet again. You come home from school and go right to work! You’re very busy and you somehow manage to get it all done.

You are such a unique young man. You are an aspiring YouTube sensation. You could spend hours recording Minecraft sessions (and sometimes do just that because everyone needs a little downtime). You are recently obsessed with Rubik's Cubes and can shock and amaze people with how quickly you can solve the two by two. You love hanging out with your friends when you get a chance, which admittedly is not often. You also just started cotillion classes very much against your will. You fought it tooth and nail, actually. Still, you put on dress pants, dress shoes, and a button-down shirt and went. An hour and a half later, we picked you up and you said you had an awesome time.
We rang in your Birthday Week with a Van Halen concert and we will be ending it with your first ever school dance, a party, and some baseball. I cannot wait to see what this year will bring for you!

Love, Mom(my) and Dad(dy)

The Holidays

There is a chill in the air today as our first Arctic cold front of the season sweeps down to my little spot of Texas. I don't know why, but I always feel so energized when the cooler weather and shorter days arrive. I recognize that I'm a weirdo. But I feel so optimistic at this time of year!

The Pop Household Holiday Season is going to be a little bit different this year. Namely because for the first time since 1979, we will not be waking up on Christmas Morning at my Mema's house.

Long story, and Mema is still with us, but we will be spending Christmas at my parents' house this year. It's an adjustment, but a necessary one.

Lots of things are different this year. At the top of the list is my family dynamic. The loss of trust and relationships with my extended family. Some unpleasantness regarding finances. Side note here. Isn't it amazing how money can drastically change a relationship? Envy, jealousy, pride, and money. They are all interconnected. And there is a moral slippery slope, apparently, when one is entrusted with the caretaking of someone else's cash.

But enough of that. I'm so looking forward to the holidays this year. Last year, we went to Playa del Carmen with my parents the week before Christmas. Got home on the 21st, and I ordered Christmas cards. Ordered and let them sit in a box. I'm considering sending them out this year. Why not? They are just sitting there, wasting my money. And if I send them out, then that's one thing crossed off my to-do list right there!

This year, just The Mr. and The Boy and I are going away. We are taking The Boy out of school a week early and going to a winter wonderland. We get back in time for the Big Day.

So, today is November 12. My father is on his way down to help me out while the hubs is out of town. Next week, the hubs goes out of town again, but this time, I'm on my own. The following week is Thanksgiving. I am hosting again. I love hosting this holiday. Lets me shine. Then two weeks later, we head to snow. Then it's Christmas! Then New Year's! The remainder of the year is close to over.

I sure have a long list of things I'd like to get done between now and then.

Clean out the playroom

Organize the playroom

Organize The Boy's bedroom

Clean out The Boy's closet

Clean out ALL the closets

Clean out the junk drawers (yes. drawers. ugh.)

Clean out the spare room

Decorate the spare room

Lose 10 pounds

Make a big Goodwill donation

Throw out all of our old coolers

Clean out the garage

Fix our wood blinds

Organize the pantry

Throw out/recycle all my old magazines

Organize my kitchen cabinets

So. Um. Yeah. It's a long list. It's ambitious. Truth be told, I'll consider myself lucky to finish the top two items.

Monday

Quick Reminder... Be sure to thank a veteran today. Well, really, you should thank a veteran every day. The reason we are all here, all typing away, going to work, driving cars, speaking (mostly) English, and have the freedom to say just about whatever we want about anyone is because of someone braver than you or I decided to stand up and protect all the things we hold dear. These United States of America are truly exceptional. I, for one, am so proud to be an American!

That being said, I dropped the ball on NaBloPoMo. I really wanted to be able to say, after almost a year of not writing more than a status update on Facebook and Twitter, I posted every single day for a month. Now that I missed a day, it's a slippery slope and I can see myself falling back into my old, non-writing ways.

All's well, though. This past weekend was one that was 100% free of commitments. I mean, we had NONE. No where to be on either day. No family to attend to. Just the three of us. It was wonderful. Until... It was wonderful until I decided to get a pedicure. At a place that serves free wine. With a good girlfriend of mine. Of COURSE that did not go well. Because of COURSE it wouldn't.

Here's the timeline:

Friend comes over after dropping off her daughter at a birthday party. It's 4:30PM. The University of Texas kicks off at 6PM. Nail place is near my home. Get to the parking lot of where the salon is supposed to be. It is gone. Call. Drive 5 more minutes to the correct location. Arrive at 4:50PM. Immediately get seated in a chair, feet soaking, and handed a lovely glass of wine. Soak. Soak. OMG! My feet are shriveled! Look at the clock and it is 5:15. I start to worry. They refill my wine. Finally the pedicure begins. They are slow.

I then get a text from my husband, "XXX and XXX are coming over for the game." Then I get a text from another good friend, "We are on our way to come over and watch the game." Then I text the hubs to let him know about that and he texts back, "It's a party. XXX and the kids are coming, too."

PANIC ensues. On my part. I can literally feel the anxiety sweep over me. I snap at the sweet little pedicurist. I tell my friend that we GOTS TO GO! She tells me to chill. She is getting a manicure, too. OMG. I was dying. Finally. FINALLY. The pedicure is over. My toes are gorgeous. It is 6PM. Texas has kicked off. I decide to go to the Mexican Market next door to get ingredients to feed our growing guest list while my friend gets her mani. And another glass of wine. I do my shopping and get back as they are finishing up. On the ride back to my house (it's 6:30 and my house is FULL of PEOPLE), I determine that probably, I should drive to pick up her daughter from the birthday party.

So it's in, say a rushed hello to everyone, apologize profusely for being a terrible hostess, and rush back out the door. We have 14 minutes to get to the next town over and pick up the daughter. We go to the wrong place. Because of course we do! 7:30, 30 minutes after the party ended, we get to the right place, and pick up little miss. We then have to run by my friend's house and finally get back to my home at around 8.

If you're counting, my pedicure took 3 and a half hours. Made stressful only by the fact that for the first time in months and months we actually had a large amount of company. Oh well. For what it's worth, it was really nice to have a little "girl" time. My toes are gorgeous. And I know I'm an anxiety-riddled fool. Once I came down from all that adrenaline and drank a little more wine, it was all good. Except, well, at 11PM, with my house still full of people, I go into my bedroom to charge my phone. And that's all I remember until I woke up, on top of the covers of my bed, fully dressed.

I'm sure glad my friends like me. Because I suck at parties.

Well Shoot!

I missed a day. Oh well. I'm not giving up on blogging. I really do enjoy it. More mañana!

On a Roll!

Wow! Today is my 8th day in a row of blogging! I have not done that in years. I'm very proud of myself.

I really enjoy taking a few moments to write a little something each day. To write more than a status update. To really take the time out to get some thoughts down.

For the past, oh I don't know, (two? three?) several years, my mother has paid for a subscription to this little bi-monthly magazine called The Upper Room. It is a book of daily devotionals, each with a Bible Verse and a story to go along with it. The stories are written by people from all over the world. Until September of this year, I would get that delivery in the mail, set it aside with good intentions, and end up recycling it, along with others that I'd found, completely ignored and unopened.

I actually started opening it up this past Sepetember and reading the daily devotionals. I didn't make it all the way through the first one. And how sad is that? I didn't have time to read a 4"x3" page with an uplifiting and inspiring message? That is just twisted.

I am proud to say that I am up to date with my November readings. It is so good to just take 2 minutes and read something that has the power to turn a day in the right direction. To be thankful for this life I've carved out. To rejoice in the fact that I am sitting here, at this computer. To give thanks for simply waking up. For my family. For the wonderful selection of friends I have. For The One who blessed me with this life.

As a pastor friend of mine writes at the end of every Facebook post... Be Blessed. Today and every day.

Happy Friday!

Ahh... Fitness... And Women Are Effing Mean.

So. This.

I work out a lot. There. I said it. I also have a difficult time controlling my food. I am quite certain that if I didn't work out as much as I do, I'd be much less happy with what my body looks like than I currently am.

I've finally hit that metabolism-slow-down that I've read about. I'm 39 years old, staring down the barrell of 40 and dang it if my body didn't decide to stop burning those Reese's Peanut Butter Cups! It's frustrating.

I've always led an active life and that, coupled with some pretty terrific genetics (no apologies here), has always enabled me to eat like shit (Yes to the Big Mac, Whataburger, Fries, and powdered sugar donuts!) and still remain relatively slender. Cry me a river, right?

We, as women, are so mean. We are so judgmental. We love to look at other women's bodies in pictures and in person and both silently and vocally judge their choices. It truly doesn't matter what they look like, either. If they are toned and in fantastic shape, they must be bitchy. If they are overweight, they must be lazy. No wrinkles? Must be surgery or Botox. Wrinkles? Why doesn't she take pride in her appearance and get some Botox?

We are also pretty much bitches about anyone who makes choices about their lives and their families that don't mirror our own. It's such bullshit. I'm so sick and tired of us being mean to one another. We have such a special club, don't we? We can do such amazing and unique things. And yet, we are so damned sensitive and insecure that we cannot bear it if someone makes a different choice than we do. We internalize it, then we externalize it. Those feelings. And we try so hard to blame someone for making us feel badly about ourselves. Damn, that's a lot of power we are giving up!

Being offended is a choice. And a low self-image is also a choice. I don't care what gossip rags, and Hollywood present as a physical ideal. In my home, and in my life, I choose my physical ideal. I don't care for the extra layer of blubber that has popped up around my middle, seemingly out of nowhere. It has nothing to do with media or that woman with three kids and washboard abs. It is MY choice to decide to do things that will make me happy. Part of that is being content with what I see in the mirror.

So yes. I will go get my Botox in a few days. And yes, I will go work out. And yes, I will try to make healthier choices and forego some of the massive amounts of Halloween candy that is residing in my pantry. Don't judge me and I won't judge you for having the extra Snickers. Fair?